On Being a Learner

Sometimes I get thoughts stuck in my head and I just can’t let quite let them go until I become okay with where I land on the thought. I have to work through them and be fascinated by the idea for a while. I roll things around in my mind, over and over. Talking about the idea to my hubby and anyone who may have scheduled any kind of time with me that week/month. This is what I have been thinking about the last week.

Lately, I have been listening to a podcast by Jefferson Bethke and John Mark Comer on Sabbath rest. I am also doing a study with some friends on the book, “One Thousand Gifts” by Ann Voskamp. One common theme between the two of them is slowing down. On learning, practicing.

In Philipians 4:11-12, Paul says, “I have learned to be content in whatever circumstance I find myself. I know both how to do with little, and I know how to make do with a lot. In any and all circumstances I have learned the secret of being content –whether well fed or hungry, whether in abundance or in need,” (CSB, emphasis, mine).

My husband and I have been discussing another topic that we are trying to get insight on. He reminded me that Paul spent years studying and learning about Jesus before he took what he learned to the Apostles in Jerusalem, and then proceeded to teach the Gentiles. Ha! Some of us consider ourselves professionals on a topic after a quick Google search, but Paul took time to learn.

Paul slowly soaked in the goodness of learning.

Most of us are not fans of the learning process. We feel like we should be able to rush through all of it and be done. Or others of us just don’t. We hate looking like we don’t understand something fully, so we just don’t engage in it. We are so scared of people knowing more than us and judging us on our lack of knowledge, so we don’t even try.

In the book, “Sick of Me”, (check out the rundown) Whitney Capps talks about the process of sanctification. She says that the process of sanctification is the point.

The process is the point.

We don’t want to learn to be content. We don’t want to practice being thankful. Or resting. Or slowing down. Or being loving. Practice often means that we are going to fail. We won’t be perfect. And we don’t want to admit that we are weak, because weakness looks like vulnerability, and vulnerability is the hardest, most awful thing we can think of. That means that people would know who we really are. That we aren’t as perfect as our Instagram filtered life would lead others to believe.

So, when we’re jerks we tell people, “this is just the way I am, accept it or don’t.” So rather than apologizing and learning from our mistakes, we refuse to do the hard things and we go on and keep on hurting people over and over again.

In our marriages, we make snide, snippy comments, and rather than apologizing and learning how to better relate to our husbands, we bask in our rottenness, and watch our marriages slowly deteriorate.

With our kids, we yell and we feel out of control, and rather than just stopping for a minute, apologizing, and stepping back, we just keep on going. We justify it.

With our churches, we find ourselves in groups of people that seem smarter than us, so we pull out feeling like we will never catch up…never taking into account the amount of time that person has been a follower. Or what they have walked through to gain that knowledge. What if instead of pulling out and separating ourselves, we came in like sponges and soaked up all that knowledge that others are willing to share?

With our Bibles, we get confused and we feel dumb, and rather than finding a tool that could help us learn, we give up and just stop learning altogether.

What would it take for us to be okay with being a learner? To be okay with the process of practicing something? Jefferson Bethke, the author of “To Hell With the Hustle”, relates this to Christmas Day. We might have an awful Christmas one year, but we aren’t going to cancel Christmas the next year. We know that Christmas is good. Even though maybe never perfect, it is good. It is good to celebrate Jesus and to give gifts to people that we love.

Just as Paul wrote about learning to be content, we can’t stop the process of trying to live content in all of our circumstances, just because we didn’t feel contentment in our day. Ann Voskamp writes that in order to be content, we need to practice thankfulness. But again, we can’t give up on practicing thankfulness because of a moment of discontent. No, we keep on practicing, because we know that even if it takes days, weeks, or months, we want to feel contentment. We want to be truly grateful because we know where everything comes from. We don’t want to live dissatisfied with our lives.

Will you join me?

Will you join me in this journey of being a learner? Of being okay with not knowing everything? Will you set your pride aside with me and practice being who you know God made you to be? Even though we might not succeed one day, let’s practice again the next day. Or even the next moment. We can do this!!

I just know it!